Carwinism

All the talk in my area and many areas around the country is making texting on your mobile device illegal while driving. Of course sending text messages while driving is ridiculously dangerous and should be outlawed for the safety of others, but isn’t there a way that we can let the process of natural selection do it’s work without endangering others? If only there was a way for the people that are doing the texting to get into a major car accident and only hurt or kill themselves? That is probably one of the major problems with society today; we’ve attempted to take survival of the fittest out of the equation. Let me give you an example; there are now warning labels on just about everything. For instance, pools that have shallow water now have signs all over them warning people not to dive in and break their necks. You might think that this is a good thing in that it could help prevent injuries and deaths, wrong! The thing is, most smart people realize that you should not dive into a pool that you don’t know how deep it is. Only a semi-retarded moron would just go diving into a pool that he wasn’t familiar with. Back in the good ole’ days, the idiots that dove into shallow water killed themselves before they could procreate and thereby ending the cycle of dumb asses cold in its tracks. A good illustration of this fact is Leonardo da Vinci. Back in an era where the average lifespan of a man was somewhere in the neighborhood of 40, Leonardo lived into his 70’s. The reason the average lifespan was so low is that morons usually died early and smart people lived to swim another day. The point I am trying to make is that anyone that sends text messages while driving is obviously someone that we do not want having kids. The only problem with allowing them to text their way into oblivion is that there is a chance that they might hit one of the smart people’s cars and injure or kill them so we are going to have to figure out another way to let Darwinism run its course. Maybe we could get some plastic bags that don’t have the “this is not a toy” warning on them and let them play. Just a thought…

Today I saw a woman driving while on her cell phone. She was going about 10 miles an hour on a 40 mile per hour stretch of road. She was completely oblivious to anything around her and talking away without a care in the world. Why don’t we make the driver’s test consist of a portion of driving while talking on a phone? If you pass, you get a sticker that you put on your license plate that indicates to police that you have been approved to drive with a phone. If you fail, you get a different sticker that shows that you are not allowed to phone while driving. Problem solved. Why is it so hard for people to see the easiest solutions? If you are caught talking while driving without the proper permit, you get a ticket and your phone is confiscated and destroyed so that maybe the hassle of having to get a new phone will make you think twice before breaking the law again…

Hey, reader Bob, is this better? Hope you’re happy, I think I am going to offend a few people here. The last thing I have ever wanted to do is to offend people…