Bomb The Canada

Why is it called “The Sudan?” What makes that country so special that you have to say a “The” in front of it? Sure, there are other countries that have a “The” in the title like The United States of America and The People’s Republic of China, but most of those have a title with an “of” in it. You wouldn’t say, “I’m going to The France” or “Let’s bomb The Canada for fun.” This is where I am putting my foot down. From now on, I am not going to put “The” in front of Sudan when I am referring to that country. I’m just going to say things like, “are you from Sudan?” We’ll see where this leads.

Speaking of bombing Canada, don’t you think it’s high time that we did? I’m getting tired of some of the Canadian’s smug attitudes about the free health care they have. Now I’m not blaming all Canadians, there are some very nice people that live in that country, but some can be downright patronizing. I’ve got some news for you holier than thou Canadian’s; there’s a reason that your country has enough money for national health care. You barely have a military! Isn’t it about time that Canada and Mexico start chipping in for the protection that we give them due to the Monroe Doctrine? Seriously, how much a year does Canada spend on its military? A few grand? The reason that they don’t have to spend a lot of defense money is because they know that if they have any threats, we’ll be there to save their maple leaf asses! How about we start collecting a little ‘protection” money from the great white northerners? We could send a couple bent noses up there. “Hey, youse guys got real clean operation going up here. We’d really hate to see anything bad happen up here like a fire or something. Isn’t that right Vito?” Let’s do this; make a worldwide announcement that we are ripping up the Monroe Doctrine and we’ll see if a few Loonies start making their way to D.C. If that doesn’t work, we’ll do like they did in the movie “Canadian Bacon” and go litter in the Canadian capital city. We’re going to Toronto!